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People who marry at an early age usually have unhappy marriages. The truth can be said for the above statement. The results are sometimes disastrous and painful for some; others seem to never heal emotionally from their experiences. In the community about fifty years ago arranged marriages were acceptable, usually the girls were around twelve to thirteen, some were luckier than others and were kept home until they were sixteen to eighteen. Even today a lot of societies still practice this arrangement. However this does not make the situation right.
Some of those marriages have lasted even until this day, but so to some has not. Why, one may ask? The marriages that lasted had to do with a certain amount of respect and acceptance for tradition. Although some of the marriages that lasted had its fair share of problems, the couples always maintained that they had to compromise and keep their respect for each other high above the troubled waters. The ones that did not last may have been so because the two people who were put together were entirely incompatible. Many stories have been heard but few have been learnt from.
Today some young people believe that they need to wait before they make that big commitment. Indeed there must be some just reason for them to conclude this. But as it is with many situations there is another side to this reasoning. And in recent studies many young people believe that if the mood is right that it makes it okay for them to get married. Strangely, this is not any surprise, since some of the reasons for getting married may be a little justifiable, the essence remains the same ninety percent of these marriages dont last. Most of the reasons given are generally along the same line.
The young lady had gotten pregnant and her family had turned their backs on her, she had no where else to go, so she married the young man, who still lived with his parents, and moved in. Of course a lot of times this is one of the very reasons that the marriages dont last, due to the in-laws. Other relationships are quite different and in the end the replies are all to familiar, I guess I did not know him after all. Some young men often find it very hard to commit to one girl, and after they get married they realize that they dont want to be with that person anymore. The consequences of this vary, for one the young lady becomes depressed and distanced.
Another result is that the young man may start to have illicit affairs and also may become highly abusive towards his wife. And dont think that the young lady does not realize her mistakes also, because it does happen that way also. However the situation may come across, the pain is constant and inevitable when things seem to not be working out. When these couples join together as one their vows sometimes are just words that are said to get it over with. Likewise, there are also some early marriages that take place today, that seem to stand the test of troubles and time.
But these are far and few. The young people who decide to wait until theyre sure of what they want and who they want to spend the rest of their lives with certainly believe that this is the right step to a successful and happy relationship. People who take their time in choosing the right mate are guaranteed to have a better understanding of what theyre getting themselves into. When it comes to deciding who you want to spend the rest of your lives with one important thing that you must keep in your head is that, things like these toy with peoples emotions.
A person that is mentally injured can be destroyed completely. This to does not mean that physical abuse does no hurt a person, but even that too inflicts a certain amount of mental pain. The evidence is all around, even in the news the percentage of violence is on the rise. So why would someone one to take that chance to get into what is supposed to be lifetime relationship with someone, and not know the person? Domestic violence is now being spoken of and the people who suffer from this are sometimes people who have rushed into a marriage. Even though the community is greatly aware that early marriages may not necessarily be the right choice for a young adult.
And even do they all agree that it can be one of the most rash decisions, a lot of young people are still allowed to get married with out the right counseling. Because some situations are genuine and can be justified, some cases need to be examined. Wouldnt you like to know that the future is filled with smart young men and women who takes their time in making important decisions that will effect the course of their lives forever? Or would you rather have a future filled with emotionally and physically abused people, who cannot help themselves? The elders in the society and all the religious leaders must come together to try to educate young people and guide them into making the right choices. It is very important that everyone knows some of the consequences of early marriages.
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