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I am writing to you in response to the essay that appeared in the first issue of Ms in 1971 entitled I Want a Wife by Judy Brady. I believe that the author of this essay does exaggerate the position a wife holds in the home, but not too greatly. This was written in 1971, when Im sure a wifes position was much more subservient than it is today. But a lot of the claims she makes still hold true in todays society. A wife to Mrs. Brady is someone who does basically everything, or in her words takes care of a wifes duties and doesnt complain about it.
This indicates to me that when a woman gets married and becomes a wife she takes on a whole new responsibility in her life. Which I do believe is true, but I believe it is the womans choice on what those duties are. This essay makes being a wife sound more like a prison sentence or being a slave, and who wouldnt want someone to take care of their every need so perfectly that you dont even realize they are doing it. Someone that doesnt complain about catering to your every need would be even better, but lets face it; even a woman couldnt do that perfectly. Which is why this is a dramatization of what a womans role in a marriage is. She states, I want a wife to take care of my children.
I want a wife to keep track of the childrens doctor and dentist appointments. And to keep track of mine, too. This is something that women seem to automatically do. I do not know of any couples where the husband is the one that keeps track of appointments of this sort or that arranges for the childrens care if both of the parents are working. Mrs. Brady makes the assumption that this is just one of a wifes duties but maybe it is just because women have a better sense of organization.
If by chance, I find another person more suitable as a wife than the wife I already have, I want the liberty to replace my present wife with another one. Naturally, I will expect a fresh, new life; my wife will take the children and be solely responsible for them so that I am left free. This statement says to me that woman are like a piece of furniture, that if it gets too raggedy you can just replace it with a brand new one and not have to worry about the old one. This is just entirely not accurate. Even if a man decides he wants a divorce and a new wife.
They are never left free of the ties to his old family, unless he just abandons them. Not even the average man could be so callous as to just forget his other life and move on without any consideration of his family. Reading this essay its hard not to want a wife. And I do believe there are men out there today that would have no problem staying at home with the children and taking care of the household duties. And I know there are women out there who would have no problem doing the same. I know this for a fact because I am one of them.
I want to be responsible for taking care of my children because I think I would do a better job than most men. In the essay the author never once refers to the children as her own children, she always addresses them and everything as his. I personally want to be that wife that does everything that needs to be done, because I do not feel that I will every find a man who could take care of everything that a wife does properly. There are some men that cook, or clean, or take care of the children. But I have not seen one example in my life of a man who does everything, but there are plenty of examples of women who do everything.
My mother to this day still and for the last 32 years, takes care of everything in her household and works as well. I see the term wife in this essay to be a generalization and not necessarily a woman. Today it could be a man, but I have yet to witness a man that perfect. Bibliography: This is a letter to the editor in response to an essay in a magazine.
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