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The Only Child Popular thinking often gives an unflattering picture of only children, portraying them as self centered, attention seeking, dependent, and temperamental. Despite these negative stereo types, smaller families in general, and only child option are growing in population. This essay will determine how and why the only child differs from a child who has siblings and if being an only child is really a disadvantage. It will also determine the advantages of being an only child. Only children, like first born's, generally have been found to score slightly higher on measures of intelligence than younger siblings. Also, first born's, last born's, and only children posses the highest level of self esteem.
Recent findings reveal that an only child is more socially sensitive, does better in school, is no more likely to be shy, self centered or spoiled than a child with siblings. (Newman, 19) Only children are generally quiet stable, secure, sharing and happy individuals. Despite daily evidence that relationships with siblings can be doubtful, many only children fantasize about what having a sibling might be like. Only children also have very strong ideas about what siblings could be, everything from associates to role models. Clearly, only children come with all sorts of personalities, whether they are shy or out going depends on many factors.
Being an only child can have many advantages and disadvantages. The disadvantages to being an only child is they may have low tolerance for frustration. For example, their used to getting what they want when they want it. Being an only child can sometimes be nerve wrecking because the parents of an only child tend to be considerate and protective of their child s feelings. Not only do they not want their child to come to harm, they themselves to do not want to be the source of injury to their child. (Sifford, 64) This causes the parents to constantly be on the child s back. Always being in the spotlight can sometimes cause stress and be depended on most of the time.
Also, being an only child is a disadvantage in terms that they might not always want to talk to their mom and dad. There are some things that an only child can not talk to their parents about and feel the need to have someone else there to talk to. Only children tend to take hurts deeply to heart and hold on to them for a long time. For example, when thinking about a difficult time still makes them angry.
They also may be private and protective of vulnerable feelings and may not want to discuss certain situations. (McGrath, 97) In spite of all the disadvantages an only child might have, only children have many advantages as well. Only children that do not have to share love and attention from parents brings a certain amount of strength and security, and since only children s toys and play things are not constantly taken away by siblings, only children find it easier to share with others. Other studies have confirmed that having an increased exposure to the adult world, only children have more comprehensive vocabularies and tend to mature earlier because of this exposure. (Sifford, 73) Since only children are often alone, they are usually searching for playmates and use toys and play things to attract others to play with them, actually creating a personality that loves to share. The extra attention the only child receives is shown in many areas from a strong sense or security to the desire to achieve. Later on in life, as a whole, only children do tend to achieve more.
There are many disadvantages and advantages of being an only child but the life style any child is exposed to, will have an affect on that child. A child learns from everything around them not just from their home environment. If a child is loved and feels warm and secure, it just doesn t matter. Every child is different in their owns ways. A person or child s personality depends on the environment that surrounds them. Any child, whether a child with siblings or an only child needs to be loved and feel secure.
So is being an only child really a disadvantage? Well, there are no major differences between only children and others. If anything only children come out looking better than others their age with regards to intelligence, achievement, and relations with adults. They are, on average, no more unstable or self centered than any other children. So being an only child can be a disadvantage as well as an advantage depending on the child, the family, and the environment. There are many factors that must be considered before judging whether being an only child is bad or good.
Some people who have experienced being an only child may feel that it is a disadvantage, and others may feel that it is an advantage, but like what was said, it depends on many factors. The stereotype says the only child can be selfish, lonely, insecure, spoiled, possessive, bossy, cautious, dependent, and unusual. But in truth, the only child can be generous, social, confident, considerate, sharing, cooperative, adventurous, independent, and normal.
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