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DOMESTIC VIOLENCE In society, the hardships in family life have led to extremely violent conditions, stemming from male dominance in the home. Through history the negative results have been apparent although the causes have been a secret until recent years. Domestic violence is deliberate repetition of emotional and more commonly, physical abuse with much bruising. Society has set labels for both of the sexes to begin this sexist feud through out history. In an attempt to understand the psychological aspects of women in domestic violence, it is important to look at the issue from a historical perspective first.
This is important so that we might gain some insight and have a perspective on this issue. Religious attitudes, in the beginning have expected women to have virtues, docility, chastity and passivity. Bishops state that religion does not support the abuse rooted from male dominance but the mutuality and love in the relationship. Yet the scripture is thus misleading.
In the Old Testament, the rib of Adam shows the submissive part a woman as a family member and created Eve. A male dominant remark was in the passage of 1 Corinthians 11, which proclaims, the head of every man is Christ, the head of every woman is her husband, and the head of Christ is God. According to the Old Testament, women and children were sought as property belonging to the husband and father. They have the right to decide for the children if they are to be put in slavery, to be sacrificed or choose to keep his children alive.
The section of the Mosaic Law on incest (Lev. 18: 6 - 18), forbids a man to have sexual relations with his parents, sisters, granddaughters, aunts, sisters-in-law, or daughter-in-law; but does not mention his own children whom he owned. If the wives and children were not obedient to the husband, then they were punished by being stoned or mutilated. Medieval women had no authority and did as men told them. In England, the men had the right to discipline the wife in order to maintain family structure.
Also in early Latin America, males had the machismo attitude and treated the females as second-class citizens. As a tradition, the existence of the female was only looked as with their relationship to their men. Daughters in some foreign countries are considered inferior and receive less medical attention, education, and food. In the Islamic religion, Muslims follow the Koran, which demands male superiority in cleansing the female organs, which are unclean. Males in Iran show their disrespect in the motto, Men are in charge of women so good women are obedient (Bender, 1994, p. 23).
In India and China, an amniocentesis is common to detect the gender of the fetus. If a girl was in the womb, the unborn baby would be aborted, since males would carry the family name, and both countries have a serious problem of over population. In several parts of Africa, the females are required the circumcision of their labia and clitoris. Diverse African societies have different ways of circumcision done by unsterilized tools. Circumcision risks include shock pain, tetanus, and hemorrhaging.
On Sally Jesse Rachel, a family undergoing domestic violence was on national television. The husband repeatedly demonstrated his womanizing ways by admitting he emotionally and physically abuses his wife to let her know he is the king of the jungle, because his is a man. When other males see this and other program like this they try to justify that hitting a woman is acceptable behavior. Men may expect women to serve and obey; women need a man relationship to be a whole person. When a child grows up, depending on the gender, is taught to portray a specific role in life.
Boys are taught to play with more aggressive type toys such as G. I Joe s or a pair of boxing gloves; while girls are expected to be the kind and sweet receiving toys such as Barbie. By their fathers, boys are taught to defend themselves by means of violence and the response of the father to the son after a fight was, Did you win? If a teenage girl was to fight in school, she would be looked upon as improper or not lady-like. Such stereo types according to sex causes dispute on the way we run family life. In recorded statistics, 85 % of all domestic violence occurrences happen when the female is the victim.
The abuser will manipulate by brainwashing the victim in believing that the behavior was the indeed the victim s fault; abuse is wrong of any kind and is illegal. Men at adulthood may not have had the attachment with their own parents and felt rejected as a child. When with a woman, he becomes more sensitive if he feels rejection and expresses it in anger. Domestic violence is an intentional act and becomes a learned behavior because of the psychological need for control. In unhealthy families containing abuse, aggression towards all family members comes into affect. The children are hit by their parents when crying, wetting their diaper, and have poor eating habits and lock themselves in the bedroom to keep away from the abusive behavior.
The individual when stressed, may misperceive the behaviors his partner and resort to the only coping mechanism he has violence (Bender, December 1998). It is not easy for a woman to leave her abusive spouse since Women who leave their batterers are at a 75 % greater risk of being killed by their batterer than those who stay. (Hart, National Coalition against Domestic Violence 1988. ) Over two-thirds of abuse cases against women were done by someone they knew (Bruno, p. 56). Men get a sense of greater power by becoming aggressive and they have the willingness to use this power in an intentional violent means against women. Possible warning signs are any physical bruises, possessiveness, jealousy, accuses of cheating, controls you on who to see and what you do on free time, blames you for his problems to make you feel bad, and forces unwanted sexual intercourse. In order for men to have and to hold on to their security in the relationship, they use any form of control possible. Abusers will hold the women down to make sure they have the complete attention from the victim and aggressively say, You re going to listen to me!
The man will hold on to the helpless wife attempting to up hold his fantasies not caring about her feelings of not wanting to. He will beat walls, punch and throw things around or near her to give her a scare in demonstrating that she is the inferior. Husbands can feel threatened by the amount of time spent with her family and will have the family move far out into the country with no car privileges, can not attend work, and no telephones. Women involved in these relationships have no social life; if they have any male friends, then they are a whore; female friends, then she is a lesbian; and if she is spending a lot of her time with her family, then she is tied to the apron strings. Judging by actions, dress, and promiscuity, abusers make up many excuses why the women provoked the abuse.
More violent men may be obsessed with animal torture and give the children harsh ways of punishment. The wife is often blamed for reasons of unemployment, not concentrating, or for just upsetting him. Batterers say that have hit women in the past but their current wife is the cause now. The behavior of the abuser does not go away. Males who contribute in these violent acts have a lower income, are insecure about marriage, are more frequent drinkers, and have a higher testosterone level. The men tend to be very negative people and have been abused as a child.
Having unrealistic expectations, the males are dependent on women for male needs: the perfect mother, wife, friend and a caretaker of emotional and physical aspects in the home. The abusers also blame the alcohol, drugs, or stress for being violent. Alcohol and drugs aggravate this destructive behavior. Just how drugs and alcohol can be treated through counseling, domestic violence can also be treated. Abusers say jealousy is a sign of love but in real life it displays the insecurities and possessiveness a man has towards the relationship, it has nothing to do with love. Domestic violence can happen to any socioeconomic class whether being wealthy or poor, old or young.
It can happen to both heterosexual and homosexual couples since all relationships contain the desire for control. Little boys are taught from the start not to hit girls, and they will carry on this respectable tendency as an adult. In rare instances, the women may be the abusers. Women are nine times more likely to report abuse than men are. (Bender, p. 9) Males are taught to take it like a man and are belittled when telling people of the man being abused. It is a popular double standard that males can not get abused. Although it is not as common, it s very possible.
Because society labels men as power and has to be a real much man, men in these situations are humiliated and think people will not believe them if they do speak up. If the men do speak up, they can respectively get the help they need. In the U. S. , there are three times as many animal shelters as in comparison to shelters for battered women and children, fifty percent of them leave their homes to live on the streets because of violence. (Cybergrll, web) The victims don t testify against the abusers because of either fear of losing the attachment toward the husband, lack of education in the judicial system, don t want husbands to go to jail, or they fear their lives. Victims who are worried for their own safety should remember their three P s: Photocopy, Pack, and Pick which will help the victims go on with their lives. Batterers don t abuse one hundred percent of the time, so women enjoy all the memories and good times that they have shared together.
If a woman stays in the abusive relationship, it does not mean she has a low intelligence; everyone does things at his or her own pace. They can get out when they feel the readiness and have the support they need. Female patients are ignored by physicians who are afraid of invading the patient s privacy and are uncertain in how to help the patient. Problems need to be dealt with not put aside. Dedicated couples end the violence through couples counseling by a therapist. Francine Hughes grew up in a family of domestic violence, married at the age of sixteen to a high school drop out, had four children, and was abused by her husband.
She did not want to tell her parents about the beating because she had to beg her parents to get married. Mickey Hughes got into a serious automobile accident, which forced Francine to visit him for forty days. On March 9, 1977, Mickey flew into a rage, beat his wife with his bare fists and burned all of her secretarial books. He also threatened to smash her car with a sludge hammer to stop her from going to school. Mickey was furious about the meal she had made for him that evening and threw the plate on the floor. He then demanded that she have sex with him.
Francine did unwillingly and when she woke up she poured gasoline around his bed, and watched the house go up in flames as she drove off in her Ford Granada with the kids. Society needs to not only look at the roles the husbands and the wives possess, but the equality they have as human beings. In order for women and men to understand the necessity for equality, the men need to accept that they are capable of nurture and women are capable of rational and responsible leadership.
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Research essay sample on Women And Children Domestic Violence
