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Allan K. Chalmers once said that, "The grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, something to love, and something to hope for. " For many, life is a journey where one struggles to learn how to compromise or balance their love for themselves and others in order to gain happiness. The Joy Luck Club by Amy Tan focuses on the basic notion of love and family; it ties together the relationships found within all the lives of the characters. All these relationships are bound by love. Although the plot and connotations behind each story may seem completely different, every person seems to take love for granted in one way or another. Through their ignoring, un-acknowledgement, or rejection of love, the characters don't realize love's importance in their lives and must learn to open their lives to it.
A persons love or at least dedication to a relationship is an important factor in The Joy Luck Club because it provides self-respect. Out of respect for oneself, one also has the capability to grow and love others. Lindo Jong's story provides readers with this value. To keep everything inside and having ones emotions bottled up and hidden away deducts from their ability to give and to experience love in its fullest. Lindo hides her true self through her duties and mannerisms required of her as a good wife upheld by tradition. Through this, Lindo suppresses her true identity and her ability to love.
Eventually, though, Lindo is able to open herself up to love and be herself through keeping the promise she made to herself. As she leaves her home to live with the family of her future husband, Lindo reveals to readers, I would always remember my parents wishes [to honor my family], but I would never forget myself (53). It is in this promise that Lindo swears not to let anything change her. Lindos story teaches readers that in order to be able to love, one must first be true to themselves. Additionally, Ying-Ying St. Clair stands as another example.
In her story, Ying-Ying reveals that, "All these years I kept my true nature hidden, running along like a small shadow so nobody could catch me" (71). Ying-Ying's efforts to conceal her identity is a parallel example to that of Lindos occupying herself with her duties in marriage to that extent that she seems to lose herself in the process. Both Ying-Ying and Lindo hide their true natures because, by Chinese tradition, the consequence of revealing their true selves may lead to that of reprimand. In the lives of these two women, the importance of love seems to go unnoticed as the characters take love for granted.
They seem to expect it to come naturally to them from their daughters and for their daughters to feel the love from their mothers. Eventually, the mothers acceptance of the fact that their relationships to their daughters lack sincerity as demanded by the daughters forces them to realize that they must put aside Chinese tradition in order to truly express their love to their daughters. These characters in The Joy Luck Club live their lives taking love for granted and often end up feeling worthless and uncomfortable. The only positive outcome of this feeling can only come about when the characters choose to stop taking love for granted through either ending a relationship or confronting the problem. In the lessons and examples learned from their mothers, the daughters have inherited their own problems with accepting love.
For instance, Lena has her own problems in her marriage. Her husband, Harold, is a clear model of a person that takes his wifes love for granted. Through his desire to make sure that everything in his relationship with his wife is split 50 / 50, Harold remains distracted from the thing that he says matters the most love. One paradigm of Harold's rejection of love is when Lena professes her love to him. It is through her simple expressions that she realizes Harold doesnt seem to love or care for her as much as she does for him: And when I got into the car, I still had the glow of that feeling and I touched his hand and said, Harold, I love you. And he looked in the rearview mirror, backing up the car, and said, I love you, too.
Did you lock the door? And just like that, I started to think; its just not enough. (174) Through Harold's response expressing concern towards his car, he is revealing rejection of Lena's love and implies that the car is far more important to him than his marriage. Unmistakably, Harold seems to be focusing too much on his material possessions and money than the love that is offered to him by his wife. Through her husbands expectations, Rose Hsu Jordan is also unhappy in her marriage and recognizes that there is nothing left for her to save.
She realizes that she needs to divorce her husband. And still, Rose insists that she is not going to let him throw her out of his life. Rose clearly isnt satisfied with her life and feels that she is living her life only to make her husband happy, not for herself. She realizes that even she has been denying herself and acts only according to tradition and her own expectations of herself as a good wife. As a result, Roses life is filled with unhappiness, and she recognizes that there is nothing else left that she can do. She, therefore, refuses to be ignored and trampled upon any longer.
It is at this point that Rose opens herself up to lovejoy love for her husband whom she is about to divorce but her love for herself. The lesson that The Joy Luck Club offers to its readers is that love opens the gates to happiness, and that one should not take love for granted through their own ignoring or rejecting love. In examining the lives of these characters and their experiences in The Joy Luck Club, one can experience and learn to realize love's importance in their lives and to open themselves up entirely to it.
Free research essays on topics related to: joy luck club, good wife, chinese tradition, ying ying, ying
Research essay sample on Joy Luck Club Ying Ying
