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Divorce and its influences on childhood Family is the first universal group. It is the first institution in the history of men. It has existed in every age and in every society and is found in all parts of the world. No culture or society has ever existed without some form of social organization. Each one of us is a member of some or the other family.
The most basic and inherent unit of this first institution comprises of parents and child. Divorce of parents is a catastrophe for a child. This event can affect a child development in all its aspects. Divorce may often seem to be better than persistence in a destructive relationship, divorce and its aftermath seemed almost certain to leave scars. Children go simply neglected and unattended as in Americas latchkey children, where thousands of children enter their homes with hidden dreams in their eyes that their parents would be their to hold them abreast after tedious day and end up in trickles of tear when they have to use their own keys to open their empty homes. Divorce is never victimless.
It wont be unwise to say that its actual brunt falls on children of the dividing parents. Family life is a source of strength and security for children. Home is the first social institution where child learns most important chapters of life. In contrast, there have also been comparable studies that detect no unusual behavior or emotional distress occurring from divorce. For example, one study involved questionnaires and concluded that the average scores attained from the children were within normal ranges when compared to children of intact families. Another research has concluded that the worst initial reactions and behaviors that occur close to the date of the divorce were by the youngest children.
In a follow-up study 10 years after the divorce, however, the youngest children were adjusting to their new environments and interactions better than siblings who were older at the time of the divorce. This event can affect a child in all its aspects and can have multiple problems in all developmental processes. Childhood is like a lump of wet soil which comes in to shape with the undergoing experiences and specially attains structure from parents hands. What if this wet soil gets strained under sour relationship of parents? It creates a major impact and so much so that neuroendocrine system of body is disturbed under stresses. Here growth can be retarded.
Nutritional demands of body can be compromised due to tensed environment at home and ultimately leading to disturbed dining times. Even sexual maturity can get affected. Such life events can increase health risk through poor health behaviors and by altering physiological stress-response systems, including neuroendocrine, cardiovascular, and neurotransmitter functioning. The leap from child to teenage is major transformational period.
Here comes abstract thinking, injustices in the world, moral principles and lot more of dreams to contribute to the world being a responsible individual. If this journey occurs through the crippled tunnel of divorce then same abstract principles can convert in to irrational philosophies which might seem true for a suffered child. His reflective thinking may force his thoughts to see world as selfish and every effort to be made to exploit and hinder social growth. His all possible reasoning may force him in to a blind tunnel of hatred and violence. Moral judgment of deciding what is right and wrong may get influenced from the prefaced sad experiences.
Achieving identity is a key development in this period but it may try to seek a revenging identity. Family relationship is an important key in social development. Todays world lives nuclear. Parents are the only family in most cases. In cases of divorce this first imprint goes unmarked. Child learns nothing of family life except for isolation and neglect.
In this regard child may even fail to interact with the society outside. In many cases child views the opposite sex as stranger and heterogeneous. Situation may take a U turn and these children may show early sexual aggressiveness. These children have been found to be more aggressive and prone to break social laws.
They may fall victim of drug abuse, drinking, assault, vandalism and illicit sex habits. Recent growth in sexually transmitted diseases has shown similar trends and cause. Early pregnancy, parenthood and under performance in school by such children reflects the root of evils. These subjects can have many more impacts on their emotional development. They may be emotionally labile. There would be unfortunate emotional outbursts which are not normal for the same age and normal development.
There could be psychological disturbances like depression, delusion, anorexia nervosa, anxiety etc. Studies have clearly reflected that these children wished if their parents had remained united or may reunite after separation. Also such subjects may remain financially poor or can be financially weak in their adulthood. They may require more medical attention.
Often such subjects have been found with low self esteem, isolation, lassitude, and stubborn. Man is a social animal and he can not live in isolation. He can not remain blind to what is happening in this world of complexities. He is told that parents are first to any relationship but when he sees an event like divorce then his faith suddenly shakes and stumbles. He is told that love triumphs but in reality he finds that hatred is in circulation.
He is bewildered and he does not know which side to lean on; bury himself in socially justified behaviors or indulge in all sorts of unconnected activities, resort to foul means and get a O when the end justifies the means, the means loses significance. But even those few who want to remain glued to their posts are not allowed to remain undisturbed. Anti social people keep a watch on such youngsters. They are forcibly drawn out of their cells to join so called mass activities. If they refuse, they are convinced by saying that this world has given nothing good to him and so he should snatch his rights from ugly grip of society. The political atmosphere of this world is so bad that even church of god is not free from perils of pollution.
No wonder if such subjects are misguided and they participate in all sorts of un scholastic activities, take to violent methods and become a problem to law and order in the end. It is not a rule that children who will suffer such events will be definitely falling on to wrong side of the road. Rather it would be wise to say that the child would be on a cross road where circumstances and factors would determine ultimate path. There are certain factors which can affect these outcomes.
If there are no financial constraints falling on child after divorce then it would certainly not hamper its education and achievements linked to it. Behavioral problems would largely depend on the whole process of divorce, which is conditions prevailing before, during and after divorce, rather than this event at once itself. The parents ability and time taken to recover from this distress would define childrens ability to adjust to new situation. During such events professionals, counselor or psychologists can be called who may guide event in a better way. It may ease things. Parents must and always be advised to not to involve children in this event.
All possible outcomes must be explained to parents in order to have a wise thought about the child before going for divorce. It would be vital to allow contact if child wishes to retain contact with both parents. Policy makers must consider child in preference and financial well being should be taken care to keep future of child safe. Multiple changes in family structure may affect childs thought as everything is going to change now. Here child may have difficulty in adjustment. Therefore considering childs likes and dislikes will affect the outcome.
Quality contact of non resident parents would also affect the quality of thought of child. It is not a rule that such children would fall in to one or other category like this. Many children would adjust to changed environment and relationships and the memories would likely fade with the advent of time. Research indicates that joint physical custody and frequent child-nonresidential parent contact have adverse consequences for children in high-conflict situations. Joint physical custody and frequent child-nonresidential parent contact do not promote parental cooperation. But again the factors which may affect the outcome and the one which may modify the outcome holds true on the basis of researches.
References Howard Gardener (1982). Developmental Psychology; An Introduction, 2 nd ed. Boston: Little, Brown. Booth, C. , Clarke-Stewart, K. A. , McCartney, K. , Owen, M. T. , & Vandell, D.
L. (2000). Effects of parental separation and divorce on very young children. Journal of Family Psychology, 14, 304 - 326. King S, Barr RG, Brunet A, Saucier JF, Many M, Woo S, Chanson C (2000).
The ice storm: an opportunity to study the effects of prenatal stress on the baby and the mother. Sante Ment Que. 25 (1): 163 - 185. Travel WM, Matthews KA. (2004) What are the costs of marital conflict and dissolution to children's physical health? Clin Child Fam Psychol Rev. Mar; 7 (1): 29 - 57. Weiss, R.
S. (1976). The emotional impact of marital separation. Journal of Social Issues, 32, 135 - 145. Allen, K. R. (1993). The dispassionate discourse of childrens adjustment to divorce.
Journal of Marriage and the Family 55: 46 - 50.
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Research essay sample on Child Learns Family Life
