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... ame into the world. We shall now consider the woman as seen and depicted in African wisdom, in the proverbs of the ages. 2. WOMEN IN AFRICAN PROVERBS Proverbs are infinitely more numerous than myths. We find them by the hundreds and thousands in every African tribe.
They address themselves to many themes and areas of life and knowledge. They are very concentrated in the sense that they put a lot of thoughts, ideas, reflections, experiences, observations, knowledge and even world views, into a few words. Here are quotes of only a few proverbs: a) Women are extremely valuable in the sight of society. Not only do they bear life, but they nurse, they cherish, they give warmth, they care for life since all human life passes through their own bodies. The following proverbs bring these points out clearly. 'Wives and oxen have no friends' (9). This indicates that a wife is so valuable that she cannot be given over to even the best friends of her husband.
For that reason, another proverb reminds us that: 'A woman must not be killed' (10). She is the mother of life, and to kill the woman is to kill children, to kill humanity itself. The woman should be handled with respect and not be treated as if she were a slave. So another proverb asks the husband: 'Did you buy me with elephant tusks?' (11), if the husband is ill-treating her.
She reminds him that he really cannot buy her; she is not a commodity for sale like elephant tusks or slaves. Even an aged woman is a blessing to men. So another proverb says: 'It is better to be married to an old lady than to remain unmarried' (12). There are areas of human life, which only the woman can fulfill. The unmarried man is lacking something, as one proverb explains: 'It is at five that man succeeds' (13). The Maasai who use this proverb explain that a successful life needs 'a wife, a cow, a sheep, a goat, and a donkey'.
This would mean, that even if one is rich, one is not successful as long as one lacks a wife. The value of the woman begins already when she is born and not when she gets married. So it is stated: 'A baby girl means beautiful cows' (14). Already at birth the woman is destined to be married. In traditional African society this entails a bride-exchange in form of cattle, services, foodstuffs, family ties, or other expressions of the marriage contract. Furthermore, the woman will bear children and thus enrich her husband and the wider circle of relatives from both sides.
So the Tsonga and Shangana people of South Africa say: 'To beget a woman is to beget a man' (15). This saying carries with it the hope and expectation, that after marriage, the wife will bear both girls and boys. b) The woman who is not married has practically no role in society, in African traditional world-view. It is expected that all women get married. So a proverb states: 'an ugly girl does not become old at home' (16), which means that the looks of a girl should not stop her from getting married. Otherwise this would deny her the role of womanhood.
This thought is bound up with the value of bearing children. The childless woman goes through deep sorrows in African society. So it is said, for example: 'The woman who has children does not desert her home' (17). This means that bearing children gives the woman the security and joy of a family, of being taken care of in her old age, of being respected by the husband and the wider society. So 'the woman whose sons have died is richer than a barren woman' (18), is intended to say that people will excuse a woman for losing her children through death, but the one who does not bear is hardly 'excused'. Consequently people say: 'A barren wire never gives thanks' (19) - nothing else is as valuable as children.
If a woman has everything else, except children, she would have no cause or joy to give thanks. The sentiment is expressed in African societies, that the more children one has the better. So the Ghanaian's say: 'A serviceable wife is often blessed with the birth of a tenth child' (20). Parental blessings often run along the lines of: 'May you bear children like bees! May you bear children like calabash seeds!' Today's economic and educational pressure will force a change in these sentiments, where parents reel the need to reduce the number of children they can support and educate adequately. Nevertheless, African society is carried away by the proverb, which says: 'The satiety of a pregnant woman is off-spring' (21).
This means that motherhood is a woman's fulfillment. c) The mother or wife is probably the most important member of the family, the center of family hood. So the Akamba of Kenya says for example: 'he who has not traveled thinks that his mother is the best cook in the world. ' This proverb, while attacking a narrow horizon in life, shows how central the person of the mother is. This sentiment is aired in another proverb from the Gikuyu of Kenya: 'The baby that refuses its mother's breast, will never be full' (22).
Other people may feed the baby or the person, but their food would never satisfy as well as that provided by the mother. Comparing her with other women or wives further indicates the place of the mother, whether she is alive or dead. The Swahili of East Africa say categorically: 'The step mother is not a real mother' (23). This sentiment is shared by other peoples and is expressed in various ways.
For example: 'Somebody else's mother, however good to you she may be, she can never be better than your own mother', or 'Your step mother is not your mother', or 'A sheep does not lament the death of a goat's kid' (24), all from the Acholi of Uganda. Their neighbors the Lugbara put it this way: 'There are no two mothers', or 'There is not another mother' (25). From southern Africa we hear: 'The mother's breast cannot get leprosy' (26). All these and many other proverbs are indications that the mother's role cannot be one hundred percent duplicated: she should provide the best love and tenderness, warmth, care, bodily and emotional nourishment, and much more. All this begins already, when the person is inside the mother's womb and should last until the mother has died or indeed, it continues when she dies and becomes a spirit, a living dead. It also means that the love, the care and tenderness should be reciprocated by everyone towards his or her own mother, since everyone has a mother.
So we hear proverbs like: 'A child does not laugh at the ugliness of his mother' (27), from the Lugbara of Uganda; or 'The mother of the big he-goat has no horns' (28), from the Akamba of Kenya. This last proverb indicates that all the 'big' men (like artists, generals, presidents, bishops, doctors, professors, inventors, singers, scientists and so one) are each born of a woman, of a mother who may not herself be regarded as a 'big' person in society. She may not 'have horns', but she gives birth to a 'big' person in society. d) Women are human beings and as such they also have their weaknesses. African society knows those weaknesses and speaks about them. One of them is jealously, especially when several wives live in a polygamous family.
Three proverbs from the Lugbara of Uganda illustrate this weakness: 'The tongue of co-wives is bitter', 'The tongue of co-wives is pointed' (which means that the co-wives can sting each other with their talking), and 'A co-wife is the owner of jealousy' (29). Such domestic problems can affect the husband who has the task of pleasing each wife. So an Uhanajan proverb says: 'Pol...
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Research essay sample on African Society Bear Children
