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... the challenges of this stage will sustain a narcissistic injury. In essence the narcissistic injury will occur whenever the environment (in particular significant others) needs the individual to be something which he or she is not. The narcissistically injured individual is thus told "Don't be who you are, be who I need you to be. Who you are disappoints me, threatens me angers me, overstimulates me. Be what I want and I will love you" (Johnson, 1987; P. 39).
The narcissistic injury devastates the individual's emerging self. Unable to be what he or she truly is the narcissistically injured person adapts by splitting his personality into what Kohut terms the nuclear (real) self and the false self. The real self becomes fragmented and repressed, whereas the false self takes over the individual. The narcissist thus learns to reject himself or herself by hiding what has been rejected by others. Subsequently, the narcissist will attempt to compensate for his or her 'deficiencies' by trying to impress others through his or her grandiosity.
The narcissist essentially decides that "There is something wrong with me as I am. Therefore, I must be special" (Johnson, 1987; P. 53). The Narcissist's View of Others Just as the individual becomes narcissistic because that is what the environment 'needed' him or her to be, so does the narcissist view others not as they are, but as what he or she needs them to be. Others are thus perceived to exist only in relation to the narcissist's needs. The term object relations thus takes on a special meaning with the narcissist. "We are objects to him, and to the extent that we are narcissistic, others are objects to us.
He doesn't really see and hear and feel who we are and, to the extent that we are narcissistic, we do not really see and hear and feel the true presence of others. They, we, are objects... I am not real. You are not real. You are an object to me.
I am an object to you" (Johnson, 1987; P. 48). It is apparent than that the narcissist maintains the infantile illusion of being merged to the object. At a psychological level he or she experiences difficulties in differentiating the self from others. It is the extent of this inability to distinguish personal boundaries which determines the severity of the narcissistic disorder (Johnson, 1987). Levels of Narcissism The most extreme form of narcissism involves the perception that no separation exists between the self and the object. The object is viewed as an extension of the self, in the sense that the narcissist considers others to be a merged part of him or her.
Usually, the objects which the narcissist chooses to merge with represent that aspect of the narcissist's personality about which feelings of inferiority are perceived. For instance if a narcissist feels unattractive he or she will seek to merge with someone who is perceived by the narcissist to be attractive. At a slightly higher level exists the narcissist who acknowledges the separateness of the object, however, the narcissist views the object as similar to himself or herself in the sense that they share a similar psychological makeup. In effect the narcissist perceives the object as 'just like me'. The most evolved narcissistic personality perceives the object to be both separate and psychologically different, but is unable to appreciate the object as a unique and separate person. The object is thus perceived as useful only to the extent of its ability to aggrandize the false self (Manfield, 1992).
Types of narcissism Pending the perceived needs of the environment a narcissist can develop in one of two directions. The individual whose environment supports his or her grandiosity, and demands that he or she be more than possible will develop to be an exhibitionistic narcissist. Such an individual is told 'you are superior to others', but at the same time his or her personal feelings are ignored. Thus, to restore his or her feelings of adequacy the growing individual will attempt to coerce the environment into supporting his or her grandiose claims of superiority and perfection. On the other hand, if the environment feels threatened by the individual's grandiosity it will attempt to suppress the individual from expressing this grandiosity.
Such an individual learns to keep the grandiosity hidden from others, and will develop to be a closet narcissist. The closet narcissist will thus only reveal his or her feelings of grandiosity when he or she is convinced that such revelations will be safe (Manfield, 1992) Narcissistic Defense Mechanisms Narcissistic defenses are present to some degree in all people, but are especially pervasive in narcissists. These defenses are used to protect the narcissist from experiencing the feelings of the narcissistic injury. The most pervasive defense mechanism is the grandiose defense. Its function is to restore the narcissist's inflated perception of himself or herself. Typically the defense is utilized when someone punctures the narcissist's grandiosity by saying something which interferes with the narcissist's inflated view of himself or herself.
The narcissist will then experience a narcissistic injury similar to that experienced in childhood and will respond by expanding his or her grandiosity, thus restoring his or her wounded self concept. Devaluation is another common defense which is used in similar situations. When injured or disappointed the narcissist can respond by devaluing the 'offending' person. Devaluation thus restores the wounded ego by providing the narcissist with a feeling of superiority over the offender. There are two other defense mechanisms which the narcissist uses. The self-sufficiency defense is used to keep the narcissist emotionally isolated from others.
By keeping himself or herself emotionally isolated the narcissist's grandiosity can continue to exist unchallenged. Finally, the manic defense is utilized when feelings of worthlessness begin to surface. To avoid experiencing these feelings the narcissist will attempt to occupy himself or herself with various activities, so that he or she has no time left to feel the feelings (Manfield, 1992). Psychodynamic Treatment of the Narcissist The central theme in the Psychodynamic treatment of the narcissist revolves around the transference relationship which emerges during treatment.
In order for the transference relationship to develop the therapist must be emphatic in understanding the patient's narcissistic needs. By echoing the narcissist the therapist remains 'silent' and 'invisible' to the narcissist. In essence the therapist becomes a mirror to the narcissist to the extent that the narcissist derives narcissistic pleasure from confronting his or her 'alter ego'. Grunberger's views are particularly helpful in clarifying this idea.
According to him "The patient should enjoy complete narcissistic freedom in the sense that he should always be the only active party. The analyst has no real existence of his own in relation to the analysand. He doesn't have to be either good or bad-he doesn't even have to be... Analysis is thus not a dialogue at all; at best it is a monologue for two voices, one speaking and the other echoing, repeating, clarifying, interpreting correctly-a faithful and untarnished mirror" (Grunberger, 1979; P. 49). The Mirror Transference Once the therapeutic relationship is established two transference like phenomena, the mirror transference and the idealizing transference, collectively known as self object transference emerge.
The mirror transference will occur when the therapist provides a strong sense of validation to the narcissist. Recall that the narcissistically injured child failed to receive validation for what he or she was. The child thus concluded that there is something wrong with his or her feelings, resulting in a severe damage to the child's self-esteem. By reflecting back to the narcissist his or her accomplishments and grandeur the narcissist's self esteem and internal cohesion are maintained (Manfield, 1992). There are three types of the mirror transference phenomenon, each corresponding to a different level of narcissism (as discussed previously). The merger transference will occur in those narcissists who are unable to distinguish between the object and the self.
Such narcissists will perceive the therapist to be a virtual extension of themselves. The narcissist will expect the therapist to be perfectly resonant to him or her, as if the therapist is an actual part of him or her. If the therapist should even slightly vary from the narcissist's needs or opinions, the narcissist will experience a painful breach in the cohesive self object function provided by the therapist. Such patients will then likely feel betrayed by the therapist and will respond by withdrawing themselves from the therapist (Manfield, 1992). In the second type of mirror transference, the township or alter-ego transference, the narcissist perceives the therapist to be psychologically similar to himself or herself.
Conceptually the narcissist perceives the therapist and himself or herself to be twins, separate but alike. In the township transference for the self object cohesion to be maintained, it is necessary...
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