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... olic and dependent parents often do not provide structure and are inconsistent, the children have poor organizational skills (McGrath et al. 19). Alcoholics may be dealing with their own impairments and may not provide an intellectually stimulating environment that encourages academic competency (McGrath et al. 19). Education is an area in which a child should be encouraged and supported.
Without proper values instilled in their young minds, children of alcoholics are robbed of their opportunity to succeed in life. Emotional Impact In his book, Let Go and Grow, Robert Ackerman lists some concerns of young and adolescent children of alcoholics. For young children the emotional conflicts are: worrying about the health of the alcoholic parent and fights between the alcoholic and the dependent, being confused by the inconsistency and unpredictability of the family patterns, feeling unloved and being scared by the possibility of violence in the family, and feeling responsible for the alcoholics drinking (Ackerman 52). Adolescents have other conflicts such as: being concerned about what others think of their families alcoholism and whether or not they will inherit the disease; dealing with living with an alcoholic and how to develop better skills for coping with their parents alcohol abuse; worrying about the health of their parents and how to survive their parents troubled relationship (Ackerman 52). Children of alcohol dependent parents are often deprived of having enjoyable experiences as a family. Because the children are conditioned to constantly handle conflict and crisis, they are unable to relax their defenses and have fun (Ackerman 9).
This is a horrible way to experience childhood and undoubtedly has an emotional effect on the individual as a child and will be carried into adulthood. The Alcoholic Cycle Numerous studies and research has attested to the fact that alcoholism is passed on through genetics and behavioral learning. Former Senator Paula Hawkins revealed that, the sons of alcoholic father are four times more likely to become alcoholics, and the daughters of alcoholic mothers are three times as likely to become alcoholics (Alcohol Abuse and its Implications for Families). Because the children of alcoholics experience a greater number of life stressors than do non children of alcoholics, they are more likely to be depressed, have a lowered self esteem, and associate with peers that are involved in deviant behaviors (McGrath et al. 19). These characteristics which develop from being a child of an alcoholic are often the cause of alcohol and other substance abuse (McGrath et al. 18). Alcoholic families often allow this behavior due to the fact that little attention is paid to the child.
Children of alcoholics are also prone to resolving conflicts by drinking, because the behavior is reinforce by the parents (Dunn and Goldman 579). Alcohol may serve a variety of functions for the emotionally scarred child. It can reduce the feelings of isolation created by the alcoholic and their spouse, act as an escape from a neglecting and abusive environment, act as a means to gain control over the childs life or be used to help boost the childs self esteem (State Window 295). Children with alcoholic parents are more likely to begin drinking at an earlier age than their peers (Windel 15). Also, as mentioned previously, parental alcoholism may cause hyperactivity. In a study by Michael Windel, it is shown that a number of children who are hyperactive children of alcoholics become aggressive and under socialized teenagers (134).
These teenagers consumed larger quantities of alcohol than their peers and the behavior expressed is predictive of adult alcohol abuse and alcoholism (Windel 134). Results of the Alcoholic Cycle It is a sad fact that many children born to alcoholics will be destined to become alcoholics themselves. With both genetic and environmental forces working against them, children of alcoholics have little chance of creating a normal, nurturing life for themselves and their future families (Seilhamer and Jacob 170). Unfortunately, the emotional impact on being born to an alcoholic family is long lasting, even if a child does not end up being an alcoholic.
Many adult children of alcoholics developed exaggerated coping styles, which lead to dysfunction in adulthood (Seilhamer and Jacob 168). It is difficult for children of alcoholics to achieve successful intimate relationships in adulthood because all they have ever known were negative relationships (Ackerman 10). Adult children of alcoholics often find themselves intimately involved with someone who is an alcoholic, or is in some way abusive. Thus, the suffocating and detrimental cycle of alcoholism continues.
Interviews In order to gain a more personalized perspective on being a child of an alcoholic, I conducted two interviews. It is important to understand that not all families that have an alcoholic member of the family are the same. I learned this first hand from the interviews that I conducted. First Interview The first interview that I conducted was on an eighteen-year-old male, C E.
He is the child of an alcoholic father and is considered to be lower class in socioeconomic status. When asked if he drank or used other substances on a usual basis he replied that he drank approximately once a month and did not use other drugs. I asked the interviewee if he was afraid of becoming an alcoholic and he replied that he wasnt. When furthered questioned about life as a child of an alcoholic, he was rather unresponsive. I feel that this is a part of the response mechanism that most children of alcoholics possess.
Ackerman states that often the parents live one way and instruct the children not to tell anyone or ask the child to deny to outsiders whatever he or she sees (7). Thus, this child is not accustomed to talking about the problems of his parents, therefore was not willing to share sensitive information. Second Interview The second person that I interviewed was more open and willing to share life experiences than the first. The interviewee is a nineteen-year-old college student named J T. Both of her parents are alcoholics and she has received counseling for the problems associated with being a child of an alcoholic. A great deal of the conflicts and experiences that J has been through can be explained by the issues mentioned in this paper.
Realization of a problem began at the age of five when she remembers asking her parents to get a divorce. The interviewees alcoholic parents had a great deal of marital conflict, which is common in alcohol dependent families. On several occasions, the interviewee was blamed for the parental arguments or blamed for the alcoholism of the parent. There were also financial problems due to the constant purchase of alcohol.
She has seen the receipts of five or six bottles of vodka and scotch purchased at a time. Because her parents were concerned with their own lives and drinking, she never really had a structured childhood. Ms. T recalls never having a set curfew and never having to prove to her parents where she was going when she went out. This lack of guidance and consistency is another characteristic of alcoholic parents behavior. Although as a child she was not asked to keep the alcoholism of either parent a secret, the interviewee was often embarrassed to invite friends over.
This is a common reaction among children of alcoholics. When she was you, Ms. T got very upset when she would find alcohol hidden around the house. However, as a teenager, she would just take the alcohol and save it for herself. She started drinking at age fourteen and was even given alcohol often as a baby. The family never had any fun family events because most holidays, occasions, or seldom trips were disrupted by alcohol abuse.
As in other families, Ms. Ts parents were not very encouraging or supportive in terms of education. They just expected her to do well and punished her when she did not perform to their standards. When asked if she was afraid of becoming an alcoholic, the interviewee responded that she was. Because alcoholism is very abundant in her family, she tries not to fall into the pattern of becoming an alcoholic. She is very careful not to drink when she is upset and does not let alcohol determine if she is having a good time.
I believe that the statement made by Ms. T that most encompasses the feeling of being a child of alcoholic parents is this: I dont know what a problem is because I dont know what normal is. The life that she has lived as a child of alcoholics is, unfortunately, the only one she knows. Conclusion As can be seen by examining the wealth of literature on alcoholism and conducting personal interviews with children of alcoholics, alcoholism is a problem that many families are faced with. Many institutions have been created in order to help the family members that are caught in the web of alcohol abuse. In studying families, it is important to learn more about alcoholic families because they represent a large number of families.
Every member of a family is affected by an alcoholic, whether it be in marital problems, child abuse or a host of other problems. Family therapists need to understand the dynamics of a family dealing with alcoholism in order to be successful in aiding the family. More efforts need to be taken to help the innocent victims of alcohols devastating wrath. The words or former Senator Paula Hawkins are a call for action: In our mutual effort to create a better world for our children, we must ensure that their freedom to develop and grow, from fetus to maturity, is not destroyed because of the disease of alcoholism (Alcohol Abuse and its Implications for Families).
Works Cited Ackerman, Robert. Let Go and Grow: Recovery for Adult Children. Pompano Beach, 1987. Boggs, Lindy. Alcohol Abuse and its Implications for Families. Select Committee on Children, Youth, and Families, United States House of Representatives, Washington. 18 Mar. 1985.
Children of Alcoholics: Important Facts. Aug. 1998. National Association for Children of Alcoholics. 27 Nov. 1999 Corral, M. M. , Holguin, S. R. , Cadaviera, F. Neuropsychological Characteristics in Children of Alcoholics: Family Density.
Journal of Studies on Alcohol 60. 4 (1999): 509 - 15. Duffey, Ellen. The Effects of Alcoholism on the Family. Select Committee on Children, Youth, and Families, United States House of Representatives, Washington. 18 Mar. 1985.
Dunn, Michael. Age and Drinking: Related Differences in the Memory Organization of Expectancies in 3 rd, 6 th, 9 th, and 12 th Grade Children. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology 66. 3 (1998): 579. Emberger, Christopher.
Personal Interview. 25 Nov. 1999. Hawkins, Paula. Alcohol Abuse and its Implications for Families. Select Committee on Children, Youth, and Families, United States House of Representatives, Washington. 18 Mar. 1985. Hudson, Andrea, et al. Pathways of Risk for Accelerated Heavy Alcohol Use Among Adolescent Children of Alcoholic Parents.
Journal of Abnormal Child Psychology 26. 6 (1998): 453 - 458. Markowitz, Sara and Grossman, Michael. Alcohol Regulation and Domestic Violence Towards Children. Contemporary Economic Policy 16. 3 (1998): 309 - 320. McGrath, C. E. , et al.
Academic Achievement in Children of Alcoholics. Journal of Studies on Alcohol 60. 1 (1999): 18 - 21. Seilhamer, Ruth Ann, and Jacob, Theodore. Family Factors and Adjustment of Children of Alcoholics. Children of Alcoholics: Critical Perspectives.
New York, 1990. Smith, Vivian. Children of Alcoholics. Alcohol, Tobacco, and Other Drug Resource Guide (1993): 291 - 295. Thibault, Jackie. Personal Interview. 27 Nov. 1999.
Window, Michael, and Searles, John. Children of Alcoholics: Critical Perspectives. New York, Bibliography:
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